Friday, May 22, 2009

The NES Quotes You Should Know

Gamers do have a social life,despite what the mass media tells you.They constantly make,and maintain,new relationships with people all over the world while playing MMOs or on online multiplayer servers.While normal folks open their conversations with the usual boring hellos,gamers have a different weapon at their disposal:their expansive knowledge of pop culture.Fire a popular quote from any old cult movie or vid game and if the other person replies with another,then you have found a new buddy.Here are the eight most unforgettable quotes from the timeless NES,the Nintendo Entertainment System.

Pro Wrestling.This is what happens when Japanese companies hire crappy translators to localise their games in the American market.And their mistakes bear gems like this,where it is still used by many gamers today.
Super Mario Bros.Ahh,how could any self proclaimed gamer forget this?Many a Gameboy and NES joypad was thrown across the room when this little baby popped up on screen.I wonder what Bowser did to the Princess while we were searching for her ass...?

Friday the 13th.Back in the day,there weren't any cheat codes.So we had to play this hard game using only our quick reflexes and determination to see the ending,which is this.Thanks a fucking bunch!
Monster Party.Monster Party had lots of strange but hilarious boss conversations,but this takes the cake.
Bionic Commando. In the 1st game,there were these neutral zones between levels where you could stock up on stuff and talk to the peacekeepers,like this guy.I bet he's pissed he didn't have a cool arm like Rad Spencer's.
Final Fantasy.Again another example of Japanese games poorly translated for the American market.This was before Square Enix became the powerhouse they are today.
Legend of Zelda 2:Link's Adventure.The game is set in a sort of medieval English period,so Nintendo tried to come up with medieval English names for their characters.While the rest were alright,they failed epicly with this one.
Punch-Out!.Nintendo's most racist game,where you punch your way past racial stereotypes to become the World Champion.Before a fight,the player would be greeted by a screen like this one where your opponent was introduced.Many outrageous quotes were spewed by them but this one is just WRONG.
So there you have it.Eight classic NES quotes that will no doubt improve your self-esteem and PR skills!Go on,try them out.
Disclaimer:The author does not bear any responsibility if the advice given in this column was not fruitful and people start avoiding you.

No comments:

Post a Comment